I’m bilingual. I speak both human and horse. Not perfectly, but with some fluency. Some days I speak horse better than human. For a while I have thought about how much I have learned about dealing with people from horses. Here’s the list:
- Trust is key, and it must go both ways.
- A little bit of pressure goes a long way.
- In order to stay going in the right direction, subtle, constant corrections are best.
- You can’t have a conversation unless you are face-to-face.
- You can’t push so hard all the time or being together will become unpleasant no matter what the circumstances are.
- Dealing with conflict is best done intentionally and in a safe place.
- Problems are rarely fixed in one session.
- It is best to change before you have to.
- End on a positive note. Always.
- If you end on a bad note, it is rarely fatal to the relationship. It may take some time but it is possible to forgive, forget, and start working together again.
- It’s okay to be wrong and to make mistakes. Just don’t continue to make the same ones.
- The best results happens when both parties are secure in themselves and in what they are doing.
The wording here is ambiguous on purpose. These are true for horses and people. You may understand this list better from one perspective or the other, but give some thought about how one or more of these may help you in your significant relationships.