Clarity- moral boundaries are first of all personal. So establishing strong personal boundaries has little to do with the beliefs of others. What you will accept and allow; what you are willing to do; how you determine to behave in certain circumstances; what you will teach your children: these are the things established by strong moral boundaries. They are individual.
The reason that making these boundaries is so important to me is that in an age of relativism, we are encouraged to not stand so strongly on personal morality, but to accept every way as valid. We are told that we have to accept ideas that we do not have to accept. And that if we personally reject ideals and philosophies that conflict with our sense of morals, then we are intolerant. None of this is true.
Strong families must stand on a strong foundation. And parents that are empowered to determine what they believe and teach their children are the best authority to establish this foundation.
The making of strong moral boundaries:
Strong moral boundaries are rooted in universal truth. Do you believe in right and wrong? Or is it all relative to different points of view? On morality, there has to be established what is right, and what is wrong. Even if you have to say to yourself, “They may not think this is right/wrong, but I believe it is.”
They recognize the right of others to disagree and live differently, without caving to those other views/ways.
They stand the test of time. Not to say that people do not change, but a strong moral belief by-and-large remains the same.
They actually dictate your behaviors and choices. Otherwise, they mean very little. I think this is a huge reason children choose to leave the morals parent have tried to instill verbally- they are not demonstrated daily.
Tension exists between a person’s moral boundaries and the world around them from time to time. The mistake is in thinking that tension is bad. It isn’t. If you are serious about your beliefs and think that they are right, you will influence great change by living with the tension in daily life with the right attitude, and maintaining the integrity of your moral boundaries. Your children will be more likely to adopt those same values.
Finally- value people as much as you value your morals. Don’t agree with their beliefs if they conflict with yours- but believe in them. That’s the cure for intolerance.
Moral boundaries- where do you stand? Where is the tension right now? What are the struggles? His bless you in your effort to do right!